May 25, 2019
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Samantha Jones and her team at UCLA (University of California Los Angeles) have made a groundbreaking discovery: Dogs with ‘waves’ are 200 times less likely to mate throughout their lifetime.

The experiment was done in a parking lot that was cordoned off for the duration of the experiment.

An interesting observation is that even after the hair returns to normal, the dogs still refuse to mate.

“This has serious implications for mumble rappers and 99% of the Soundcloud community” Jones says.

In a recent terrorist attack perpetrated by PETA, seven pregnant dogs escaped the experiment boundaries and are now living in UCLA illegally.

Experts say that the dogs will produce sixteen babies every 6 months before crossing the border to the nearby Walgreens. They estimate that this will take approximately 2 months, and at that point there will be more dogs than students, increasing the likelihood that poor dogs will take rich student’s positions.


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